


but i'm tongue tied and twisted

by theodorelupins



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-04 01:13:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2903897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theodorelupins/pseuds/theodorelupins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it’s not that she doesn’t love him anymore, it’s that his arms are perfectly framed by his sweater and she can recall nights spent tucked away beneath the same limbs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	but i'm tongue tied and twisted

it’s not that she doesn’t love him anymore, it’s just that her blood feels as though it is past the point of boiling when he enters with a plum-lipped brunette.

his lithe body slices through the haze of the cigarette smoke enveloping the small loft. it’s one of their mate’s, a classmate from years ago who had recently moved in with his lover. 

and suddenly, victoire excuses herself from the lackluster conversation she had been roped into. the loft is too small to accommodate the sheer amount of bodies filling the space. she feels elbows and shoulders bump against her as she attempts to navigate the crowded space. the sudden appearance of the blue haired boy had sent a strong craving for a glass of firewhisky through her bones.

she manages to attach one hand to the neck of the bottle when she feels familiar, pastel chalk stained, smooth fingertips close the space between the bottle. on impulse, victoire draws her hand away to see him, standing there before her.

it’s not that she doesn’t love him anymore, it’s that his arms are perfectly framed by his sweater and she can recall nights spent tucked away beneath the same limbs. 

teddy’s eyes widen in foolish surprise. he should have realized that she would be here. here…in the same loft as him after months of being out of his life. and she’s there, in that silk slip with the hem that tasted like strawberries and the straps that so easily melted in his fingers as he removed the garment that spring afternoon. she’s radiant, a sunflower tilted towards the sun in the breeze, and she’s touching him oh god, he missed the familiarity of the spark that courses through him.

"wait," he calls over the music, realizing that she has every intention to retreat. 

victoire flinches.

"wait," he continues. "please don’t go. meet me outside, on the patio?"

victoire doesn’t know why she listens. she doesn’t owe him anything. he was reckless and stupid with her heart, he didn’t truly care about her. the night that he told her he couldn’t stay, that the miscarriage had reminded him too much of the parents he had never known, that he felt responsible…that night, he left any right he had to

it’s not that he doesn’t love her anymore, he realizes, as she disappears in the sea of people. it’s that he can still feel the venom in his heart as yet another life he had yet to know slipped away beneath his fingertips. it’s that he feels as though the memories of daisy chain crowns and cups of chamomile tea and the soft skin of her stomach were somehow stolen, that he was undeserving of being the authentic keeper of such small tokens of love. 

she doesn’t know why her body feels drawn to the glass door leading out to the ornate patio. candles float around the balcony, under some sort of spell that seems to also keep the wind unseasonably warm. there are still a plethora of bodies scattered around the area, but much less than were inside. victoire pushes past a group of witches to get to the corner, a miraculously abandoned space.

in several moments, she is greeted by the site of teddy lupin. and he looks so god damn handsome, her chest tightens immediately upon his arrival. her heart thrashes beneath her skin. she so badly wants to push him away, to reveal the scars that never seemed to quite heal from his ripping away from her. but at the same time, she can’t deny the sickening wish to pull him closer, to kiss him and trace the light smattering of freckles on his back.

"what about your friend? won’t she be missing you?” victoire cuts the silence, unable to keep the quip from escaping her lips.

teddy blinks in surprise, her curtness both familiar and surprising. “my…oh, no,” he shakes his head vehemently. “she’s just a friend, the daughter of the owner of the hostel i stayed at when i was…” he stops, realizing that he’s about to reveal details that she may not want to hear. “anyway, we’re not…you know, together.” he’s blabbering, he realizes, and immediately closes his mouth.

victoire gives a cautious nod, still reeling from being near him. a few moments of silence pass. “teddy, i don’t know what you want me to say…” her voice trails off and she curses herself for not being able to deliver the screaming words she’s wanted to exchange with him for months. “i was hurting, and you left. you left for two months. you left me to pick up the pieces, no matter if you thought you were helping." 

teddy closes his mind, painfully aware of the unfortunate setting. “i was wrong to leave you,” he feels his face flush. he wants to reach out and run his fingers over the skin between her neck and her shoulder, he wants to squeeze her hand and kiss her beneath the stars. “i’ve always felt as though i wasn’t…good enough. i’ve never felt as though i was worthy enough to have you. i mean, look at you. you’re so fucking beautiful, vic. and smart, and wonderful, and me? i’m an orphan. i’m a fucked up kid who rebelled too much when i was younger to remember how to not fuck up my life.” 

he opened his eyes once more, taking a deep breath. “and then…you lost the baby, and i couldn’t handle it. i was selfish, and i thought that you would hate me, that i was…cursed, and i couldn’t take it,” he felt his chest tighten, and he willed tears to not spill down his cheeks. he fiddled with the sleeves of his shirt.

"but i realized while i was away that…you never thought i was cursed," he looked up, daring himself to meet eyes with her. "all of those years at school where i was constantly in trouble, constantly trying to destroy myself…you were the only person that anchored me." he reached out and hooked his index finger over her wrist. "i love you, vic. i fucking adore every part of you, and if you’ll have me again, i’ll be so unbelievably yours."

it’s not that she didn’t love him anymore, victoire realized, his words seeping into her skin. it’s that he was her home, and she was so aware of the ghosts behind his eyes that were haunting him…because they mirrored hers. she had been empty without him, and now he was back, and maybe she wouldn’t be whole again for a while.

but all she knew is that when she closed the gap between them, lacing her fingers through his galaxy blue locks, and pressing her lips against his, love coursed through victoire’s veins. “don’t you ever run away again, my star boy,” she whispered into his ears. “and if you do, i’ll be right there beside you.”


End file.
